Young Marriages Forsaken by Society
by Rachel White
Young marriages are seldom seen today. Christians and non-Christians alike are taught to pursue careers, secure a good amount of money in the bank, and then, perhaps marry in their late twenties. While it is extremely important for a man to have a job and home before marrying, why wait so long to prepare for marriage?
It was custom in the old days for young girls to have "hope chests", which were trunks filled with things for their future homes - like pots and pans, quilts, bed-sheets, candles, dish sets, etc. These things were mostly made by the girls themselves or were family heirlooms. Girls started these at a very young age (I read of one girl who was nine). Obviously, every girl was taught to expect marriage.
Modern Egyptian girls married at 12 or 13. It was rare indeed to see an unmarried girl over sixteen. The ancient Jewish men married around 18. While girls were permitted to marry once they reached twelve. It was said of this custom, "early
marriages are of very frequent occurrence amongst foreign Israelites, but owing to the Industry, and general activity of the whole race, what cynics might look upon as premature unions, seldom result in unhappiness or pauperism." - William Teggs, 1877.
In the early days of New England, Puritan adults hated being unmarried. Shortly after a man was widowed, he would almost immediately remarry. Bachelors were few in number, and were almost suspected as criminals. The age where a girl was considered to be an old maid was reached very early. Higginson once spoke of an "ancient maid" who was but twenty five years old.
Many say the main reason people married so early, was because they died young. Abiah Folger, who was one of the first settlers of New England (around 1682), had ten children, was never known to have a sickness, and she lived to be eighty five. Madame Austin, who also lived around that time, gave birth to sixteen children, who all lived to be at least one hundred years old.
The reason God created woman, was because man was lonely and needed a "help-meet." It is unnatural for anyone to remain single. People say that there are more women in the world than men, and that is why some women have to stay single. Saying that is like saying the world is over-populated with children. There is no way of finding that out! Where's the proof?
Marriage is completely Biblical. What is so bad about a girl marrying in her teens? Every girl's ultimate hope, from the time she is little playing with her dolls, is to someday be a wife and mother. Why are we trying to suppress this? Isn't that
feminism?
I am looking forward, with great anticipation, to the day when I'll are married and have children of my own. Why wait so long to fulfill this natural desire?
Another point, is the man you choose to marry. I have read in many magazines those lists of standards girls make of what their future husband must have (like what kind of job he has to have; foods he must like, etc.) While I do think a girl must have her standards, some people take it too far! I don't have a huge book of standards. All I have to know is that
1. He shares my religious beliefs and
2. He loves me.
What else is there we must have in a man?
There are a lot of benefits for a girl who marries young. For example, she gets a head-start on having babies. *Why else do you think girls menstruate so young?* While I do not agree with 11 or 13 year olds getting married (they do this in some parts of the world), I think it is perfectly acceptable for a girl to marry in her middle or
late teens. Why not marry at seventeen?
"He (Governor Winthrop, 1700's) had been but seventeen years old himself when he was married,
but he was, so he writes 'a man in stature and understanding.'" - Alice Morse Earl
"In the Early Days of New England colonies, no more embarrassing or hampering condition, no
greater temporal ill could befall any adult Puritan than to be unmarried." - Alice Morse Earl
Taken from the July / August 2001 issue of Ensconced
Copyright 2001 by Rachel White
http://members.tripod.com/ensconced
Young Marriages Forsaken by Society
